Should I keep Pushing Myself or Rest? Four solutions
– self-care can sometimes be used as an excuse to not engage with activities & the achievement of goals
– it is very challenging to know when to push or rest yourself – particularly when you are suffering with depression, anxiety &/or chronic pain – sometimes:
– pushing through is sheer folly (no pain, no tai ) & can lead to a deeper hole of exhaustion where a person pushes, but then pays
– cultural pressures about achievement & laziness – the inner-critic further compounds these cultural pressures because we are even subconsciously influenced by the culture – this ruins rest with regrets & second-guessing
– we over-do the rest – because everything feels confusing &/or feels overwhelming (at least initially) – this can worsen mood & pain
Four questions to ask yourself to determine whether to push yourself of rest:
1) is this the rule or the exception?
– the Chronic Pain literature says pain is usually a sign to rest; however, when pain is the norm, too much rest can make you feel worse – so activity which is engaging & paced can be beneficial to consider; the same can apply to mood/anxiety – if distress is out of the ordinary – rest, but when the norm/chronic or a diagnosable condition – push yourself
2) Have I enjoyed this before?
If you have previously enjoyed an activity, the chances are you will again – therefore engage; however, if you have always hated it, it is ok to not go/rest
3) & 4) when do I push myself to get better & when do I say I am good enough?
– the answer – counter- intuitively is to do both simultaneously – self-acceptance & self-improvement can play nicely together
– Carl Rogers – the curious paradox of life – when I accept myself as I am, then I can change
– accepting talents & flaws/ strengths & weaknesses
– for e,g, acknowledge you get defensive when given criticism, but you can decide to acknowledge this & work on being open to receiving (& possibly accepting) such criticism without being defensive
– self-compassion acknowledges weaknesses without burying them & provides a better chance of contending with areas requiring improvement
Source: Savvy Psychologist | podcast date: 10 August 2018