Three Toxic Thinking Habits that Feed Your Insecurity

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Three Toxic Thinking Habits that Feed Your Insecurity

Summary:
– Another word for toxic thinking habits is cognitive distortion
– They are difficult to change because they often “feel right”
– All human beings do cognitive distortion is from time to time

1) Emotional reasoning [particularly harmful in the context of relationships]
– Mistakes feelings for fact
– If you feel guilty it must be your fault
– if you feel anxious something bad must be about to happen
– Because I feel jealous – It proves you are cheating on me
– Because I feel vulnerable – we must be about to break up
2) Mind reading
– You’re insecure thinking puts judgements into other people’s heads – Making you think other people are judging you and are about to reject you
– You might also mind read that you believe others feel superior to you
3) Personalisation
– such thinking – Everything is about you
– Leads to self blame / paranoia

Tips to help manage these three toxic thinking happens:
– Half the battle is catching yourself (when you notice your mood plummets
1) Put your thoughts on trial – You need hard evidence / facts – not gut feelings or intuitions
2) Act confident & secure – Also known as taking “opposite action” to what you would normally do
– Act the way you want to feel, and your thoughts will eventually catch up
3) Inoculate yourself against insecurity
– You have serious questions about your confidence & worth
– Prepare for doubts, by planning ahead with realistic expectations &
– No matter what I do, some people will not like me
– Develop realistic mantras that target your insecurity
– Repeat your mantra over and over – this is a way of facing your insecurity and thereby extinguishing your insecurity

Source: Savvy Psychologist Podcast | 12 May 2017

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