The 5 Social and Emotional Competencies – Social and Emotional Learning

The 5 Social and Emotional Competencies – Social and Emotional Learning

  • Making and building social relationships
  • Manage emotions to feel and learn better
  • Everyone experiences a broad range of emotions and being able to manage them (and their consequences) is vital
  • It is also important for people to develop an understanding of their temperament (for e.g. knowing that you “fly off the handle” really easily when frustrated
  • These competencies are the basis for knowing how to “negotiate life” (home, work, society more broadly) and to develop insight into who they are as a person.
  • Approach: refrain from saying don’t do X, instead – show how to do it

There are 5 key competencies:

  1. Self-awareness
    1. The ability to understand yourself
    2. The ability to identify the emotions he or she is feeling
    3. Strategies to deal with their anger (with support from others – e.g. parents, teachers, friends etc.,)
  2. Self-Management or Self-Regulation (a key skill to learn)
    1. This is about coping with things that do not go to plan
    2. About understanding and controlling your own feelings so the person does not “fly off the handle” when frustrated
      1. It is about understanding and resolving them
      2. It is about inhibiting behaviour that is not socially appropriate and inhibiting the
    3. Social awareness[1]
      1. Show understanding and empathy for others
      2. It is about placing yourself in another person’s shoes & think about how their actions may affect other people
        1. The next level – which is more sophisticated – is understanding why might a person being feeling &/or behaving in the way they do [stories are a good way to teach this]
      3. Relationship skills[2]
        1. It is about getting along with others
        2. It is about working in teams
        3. And it is also about dealing effectively with conflict
        4. These skills are further developed by:
          1. Effective Communication
          2. Knowing how to build relationships
  • Knowing how to negotiate
  1. Knowing how to say no/refuse certain requests
  1. Responsible decision-making
    1. It is about taking the time to consider choices, and thinking about consequences, to make the best decision
    2. This competency is further reliant upon skills such as:
      1. Being able to analyse situations
      2. Assuming personal responsibility
  • Respecting others
  1. Problem-solving

Source: KidsMatter

[1] It is believed that this skill is often innate in most people.

[2] These skills are informed by the first three competencies.


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