9 Signs of Borderline Personality Disorder

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9 Signs of Borderline Personality Disorder

BPD: originally thought to be on the border between a mood disorder & Schizophrenia.
– any personality disorder by definition is a lens through which you see the world
– it is an ingrained way of thinking & feeling about yourself, other people & the world; it also affects all domains of life – work, school, relationships,friends, etc., [markers are instability in relationships, friends & emotions – & this is stable over time]

Summary:
1) fear of abandonment (I.e. being dropped by friends, or your partner at any moment – it feels very real; fear of rejection makes you “a little desperate”; a partner coming home later than expected, or a friend re-scheduling a coffee date at the last moment can make you fly into a jealous rage, stalk them on social media, or fly into a jealous rage – you are convinced they are leaving you even when they reassure you; such reactions actually push people away)
2) unstable relationships (all are intense – you love them; you hate them | you need them; they are dead to you | i hate you; don’t leave me | you crave a hug, but warn don’t touch me | you fall in love quickly & whole-ly, but things do a 180 just as quickly) – it is “whiplash in emotional form”; your life is characterised by passion & conflict
3) feeling unsure of who you are (characterised by uncertainty & angst) – you might try out different jobs/different social scenes/religions/lifestyles/ sexual practices/identities / groups of friends [sometimes you feel pretty good, but quickly flip to hating yourself/feeling non-existent
4) I make bad choices, especially when angry, sad or frustrated & find yourself in situations you later regret – food binges, drunkenness, drug benders, spending sprees, shoplifting, sleeping with strangers or toxic exes – it may be a welcome distraction at the time, but when the dust settles you are left feeling crazy,regretful & out of control
5) large mood swings (flip feeling fine to horrible like a light switch) & it is difficult to let things slide
6) anger – your temper is hot; your fuse is short & your anger is explosive + it is often stronger than the situation warrants (may fight, yell, thrown dishes even a punch); you do not spare yourself either & are often harder on yourself than anyone else
7) emptiness (you often feel empty inside & have no emotions at all)
8) self-harm (you can control physical pain not emotional pain) – you may even threaten to kill yourself to see if anyone cares (suicidal gestures to end emotinal pain)
9) at times of stress, thins can seem unreal (as if in a movie); you may be paranoid & that others are out to get you

DBT (dialectical behaviour therapy) skills:
– Emotion regulation
– Interpersonal effectiveness
– Mindfulness – observe & describe
– Distress tolerance

Savvy Psychologist podcast | 23 September 2016

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